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Bones
Bones & Bones: Undead Vigilante Justice is an episodic third-person adventure game for the Wii U developed by Laughball Interactive. It stars the Bones Brothers, a pair of skeletons on a quest to deliver street justice to the afterlife. Gameplay Bones & Bones is a third-person adventure game with a variety of shooter and detective elements thrown in. Players control Calce and Colage Bones, two skeletons with unique skillsets - Calce is agile and wields a revolver whereas Colage has more charisma and wields a machine gun. Gameplay revolves around exploration and mystery-solving, with combat segments scattered through the game. Story Episode 1: Bones & Bones in: Gambler's Luck The story opens with Calce and Colage Bones entering the Ghoul Grand, a massive floating casino in the afterlife. The two explore a bit, Calce excited to make big bucks, but Colage finds the place shady, noticing the staff acting nervous and a lack of any winners. Calce bets all his money on a race while Colage goes to get drinks. ---- :Skeleton waitress: What can I get for you, handsome? :Colage: Flattery ain't getting you anywhere, tuts. Two Dreadful Souls. The skeleton waitress begins making the drinks while a mysterious fly demon taps Colage on the shoulder. :Beelz: Psst. Buddy. Pal. Compadre. Chum. Name's Beelz. :Colage: Yeah, and? :Beelz: Got dirt on this place, amigo. Good dirt, homie. ---- Before Beelz can continue speaking to Colage, Calce pushes him aside and says he lost all his money on the race. Colage begins freaking out and says the two can't go home now. Beelz walks away mubbling and the Bones Brothers sit down to drink away their sorrow. From the shadows of the casino, a much larger skeleton slinks up to the bar, surrounded by sulking employees. Calce drunkily tells him to 'stop branching over here' but Colage shuts him up when he sees the guy's picture on the wall. The skeleton introduces himself as Kingpin Bojangles, owner of Ghoul Grand. Calce quickly backpedals and tries to haggle his money back, but instead lands the brothers jobs at the casino. Weeks later, while cleaning off roulette wheels, Calce and Colage meet Beelz again. Beelz tries to tell them to quit, but the two refuse. Beelz leaves the two with a business card for a shop in the strange backalleys of Little Earth, where they find even more sulking workers and another portrait of Bojangles. They decide to explore the casino after hours for answers. Returning to Ghoul Grand, Calce and Colage are surprised to find employees still working like normal. Colage remembers the waitress and returns to the bar to interrogate her. Calce sees someone in the shadows and goes looking for them. ---- :Colage: Hey, missy, you know about all these employees? :Skeleton waitress: Bo...jangles... :Colage: Guy runs the place. But what about the workers? The waitress points behind Colage, where Kingpin Bojangles looks pretty freakin' mad. :Skeleton waitress: Bo...jan...gles... ---- Meanwhile, Calce follows footprints through the casino, eventually ending up in the bathroom where Beelz has set up a bomb in the urinal. Beelz says he tried to warn everyone about the fact that Ghoul Grand is stealing souls. Calce manages to wrangle his revolver from him and holds him at gunpoint whilst trying to call Colage. Colage wakes up in an office, tied to a chair across from Kingpin Bojangles. Bojangles explains he keeps the economy of the afterlife running by starting up business and essentially gaining a monopoly on every industry. To make ends meet, he steals the souls of his employees so they can work forever. Colage tries to escape, but can't break the ropes. Calce and Beelz walk through the casino, Beelz still at gunpoint, trying to find Colage. They find his phone and decide to follow a trail of trading cards that Calce recognizes as his brother's, walking into the office. Beelz attempts to attack Bojangles, but a worker shoots him from the shadows and unties Colage. Bojangles agrees to let the brothers keep their souls if they become his number one taskforce - doing his errands and dirty work. The brothers look at Beelz's twitching corpse and reluctantly shake hands with Bojangles, who laughs. Episode 2: Bones & Bones in: Hitmen Calce and Colage enter Kingpin Bojangles's office with groceries, disturbed by Beelz's corpse still lying around. A worker quickly sweeps the body away, while Bojangles beckons for the brothers to stay and talk. Two seats appear suddenly and the brothers sit down, anxious about their boss's wrath. ---- :Kingpin Bojangles: Now, boys, listen here.. :Calce: We didn't snitch. I swears! Swears on good ol' Mama Bones, God bless her soul. :Kingpin Bojangles: What? No, no, that's not it. I'm contracting you two out as... unlicensed reapers. Colage spits out his drink. :Colage: You want us to be hitmen? :Kingpin Bojangles: You want to keep your souls? ---- The Bones Brothers reluctantly agree, and Bojangles presents them with their first contract, pulling an eyeball from a drawer which quickly expands into a window into the living world. A young woman rants about her crappy boyfriend Matt and off-handedly mentions she wishes he'd go jump in a ditch. Colage still tries to find a way out, but Bojangles sends them into the living world. Calce and Colage find themselves in a rather bland suburb, next to a gas station. The two break in and attempt to find Matt. Failing to find him, the two decide to "go undercover" and don uniforms, spending the night eating chips and screwing around. An employee enters at the break of dawn and Calce knocks him out, stuffing him in a closet. Colage quickly flees the scene, but Calce, mad with power, claims this is his kingdom and that he shall rule. Calce locks down the store and arms himself with a crowbar while Colage looks for Matt. Unsuccessful in finding him around town, Colage returns to the gas station, where Calce refuses to let him enter. As the two argue through the door, the girl from before pulls up in a car, seemingly unfazed by the two skeletons. She introduces herself as Olivia and uses her keys to open the doors, frightening Calce. Colage attempts to ask her about Matt, but she figures out the brothers' intent and refuses to tell them. Leaving the shop in defeat, the Bones Brothers sit on the curb, unsure of what to do next. Two passerbys discuss a pool party Matt is holding later and the brothers quickly head to the presumed location to kill Matt before the party starts. Reaching the pool, the brothers hide in some bushes, Calce preparing to shoot Matt. Colage still seems doubtful, but the two quickly spot Matt and Calce jumps out of the bushes. ---- :Matt: Skeletons?! What the- Calce shoots Matt in the chest several times before dropping the gun. :Colage: HOLY CRAP, YOU JUST KILLED A GUY! :Calce: OF COURSE I DID! THAT'S WHY WE'RE HERE! :Colage: I DIDN'T THINK WE WERE ACTUALLY GONNA DO IT! Olivia walks in. :Olivia: Hey, Matt, I forgot my phone an- OH MY GOD, YOU SHOT DEVIN! :Calce and Colage: DEVIN?!? :Olivia: HE WAS MATT'S BROTHER, YOU PSYCHOS! ---- Olivia runs up and tries to wrestle Calce's revolver away. Before she can, the Bones Brothers are teleported back to Bojangles's office, where he sternly looks at them and sighs. The episode ends with Calce and Bojangles screaming at each other while Colage, shaking with fear, looks at his hands. Episode 3: Bones & Bones in: Coping With Losses Still shaken by Devin's death, Colage becomes reclusive and angry with Calce, eventually buying an apartment on the outskirts of the city. Calce tries to talk him into going back and helping him deal with the increasingly furious Bojangles, but Colage refuses, deciding to fortify his apartment as to protect himself from his boss. Back at work, Bojangles decides to give a new task to Calce - disposing Beelz's bomb, which is still unarmed in the bathroom. Calce complies and removes the bomb, and is told to sell it on the black market. Venturing back to Little Earth, Calce attempts to find a buyer to no avail. Putting the finishing touches on his fortress, Colage gets a call from Bojangles and listens in briefly before throwing the phone in the trash. Reduced to a husk, Colage proceeds to watch Top Gun 41 times in a row. Having passed out on his couch, he fails to notice an mysterious thief breaking in and taking his food. Still incapable of finding someone to purchase the bomb, Calce takes his frustrations out on a brick wall, inadvertedly hitting a switch that opens up a tunnel leading down. Calce enters and finds the Bomb Depot, where he manages to pawn off his bomb for twenty dollars. He leaves, immediately realizing his mistake, and runs back in. ---- :Calce: Good sir, I'd like to buy a bomb. :Bomb salesman: I have many bombs. Which would you wish to purchase? Calce points at Beelz's bomb. :Bomb salesman: Can't buy that one. Got a paying customer who reserved it. Tough luck. :Calce: In the sixty seconds I was gone, someone reserved this bomb. :Bomb salesmen: Yeah, big Bojangles himself. ---- Seconds away from exploding with seething rage, Calce stomps back out and calls Bojangles, demanding an explanation. Bojangles claims to have never ordered the bomb disposal and Calce shrieks at him before hanging up and heading back in. He quickly picks up a bomb and arms it before leaving. Colage wakes up and mumbles the lyrics to Danger Zone before getting up and getting dressed. He looks at himself in the mirror and decides to talk to Calce, heading to Bojangles's office, where Kingpin Bojangles is trying to handle the Bomb Depot situation. Colage sits down next to Calce. ---- :Colage: Bombs, huh? :Calce: Glad you have you back, bro. :Colage: You need me to keep you from destroying a business, I need you to keep me sane. Nothing more to it. :Calce: We're probably about to lose our souls. :Colage: Probably. ---- Bojangles gets off the phone, seemingly very calm. He explains that his sources tell him Bomb Depot was planning to attack his businesses, thusly meaning Calce actually did really well. Colage agrees to return to the job and Bojangles agrees to let him, saying there's a big operation coming up that makes or breaks the fiscal year... Episode 4: Bones & Bones in: All Aboard Sitting at the train station disguised in trenchcoats, Calce and Colage await a call from Bojangles. The two speculate about the operation in store - Calce thinks they need to get something off a train, Colage thinks they need to put something on a train. Their conversation is interrupted by a call from Bojangles. ---- :Colage: Boss, we're at the train station. :Kingpin Bojangles: Good, good. You need to be on the 2:15 to the Factorium. :Calce: Tickets handled. What's our job? :Kingpin Bojangles: There's an important client on that train. Get her to me- Calce silently mocks Colage. :Kingpin Bojangles: -then put a bomb on the train. Calce looks away and mumbles to himself. ---- Bojangles texts the two some files on the client as they board. Calce looks over the files and tries to identify the client - a banshee named Decina. Colage realizes the two don't have a bomb and sneaks to the cargo train to try and make one. Colage finds Decina who quickly begins running away when he mentions Kingpin. Quickly becoming suspicious of Calce, the passengers begin questioning him. He manages to distract them by pointing out the beautiful view out the window and runs after Decina. Chasing her to the cargo car, she explains to Colage and Calce that she's important because of drugs carried in her bloodstream. Colage and Calce huddle up and determine their plan - Colage will keep an eye on Decina and set up a bomb while Calce distracts the passengers. Not sure how to create a diversion, Colage brings up the 'dulcid tones', causing Calce to cringe before leaving the cargo car. Colage locks himself and Decina in the cargo car. Calce tries to distract everyone with a story about the time he won a talent show, but quickly ends up cornered and asked to present his talent. He steals a ghost's sunglasses, saying he'll need them, and says his talent was singing. Meanwhile, Colage and Decina talk, Colage unsure of why Decina doesn't just scream her way out. Decina elaborates more on herself - the drug in her bloodstream has a highly potent numbing effect on most undead species, and is used by the police for interrogations, keeping suspects in line. On banshees, it just messes up their screams, making them effectively useless. Colage briefly shows remorse, but goes back to his work. Suddenly, Calce busts in, seemingly exhausted. ---- :Calce: Colage, please tell me the bomb is done. :Colage: Not yet, why? :Calce: I've sung Great Balls of Fire like, 6 times! I can't keep their attention forever! :Colage: Just sing something else. :Calce: I only know two songs, and the other one has to be done by a quartet. :Decina: I can help, I guess? ---- Decina and Calce leave the cargo car, still in need of two singers, and recruit the conductor and a chef to help. Calce paces, knowing the song has to be done perfectly to distract the passengers, but agrees to do it for the greater good. The four board the passenger car and begin. music ---- :Woah, oh, oh :For the longest time :Woah, oh, oh :For the longest :If you said goodbye to me tonight :There would still be music left to write :What else could I do :I'm so inspired by you :That hasn't happened for the longest time ---- Colage finishes up the bomb and enters the passenger car, but sees Calce happy and decides to wait for the song to end. He sets the timer to last a bit longer before sitting down. ---- :Who knows how much further we'll go on :Maybe I'll be sorry when you're gone :I'll take my chances :I forgot how nice romance is :I haven't been there for the longest time ---- Calce looks to Colage and manages to get one of the passengers to sing in his place. Calce says he's okay with leaving now, and the two grab Decina and jump off the train. ---- :I don't care what consequence it brings :I have been a fool for lesser things :I want you so bad :I think you ought to know that :I intend to hold you for :The longest time Episode 5: Bones & Bones in: The Promotion Returning to the office with Decina, Calce and Colage announce the success of their operation, expecting resounding praise from their coworkers before remembering that theor coworkere have no souls. Bojangles congratulates the brothers and decides to promote them to managers. He also tasks Calce with keeping an eye on Decina while preparations are made. Sitting down at their new desks, the brothers contemplate what to do first. Colage asks a group of interns if he can have some water and they all savagely scramble to get him a cup. Calce orders the cleaning crew to reenact movie scenes, slightly irritating Colage. Decina suggests they promote random workers and leave for a night on the town, but only Calce does so. Riding bumper cars at a local carnival, Decina questions Calce about Bojangles. Calce admittedly knows very little about his boss, aside from his several businesses and presumable power, and asks Decina about herself. Decina says she's from the upper planes of the afterlife and that she's 'made several regrettable choices lately'. Colage attempts to keep the workers happy and productive, heavily micromanaging things like office placement and paychecks. Still unsure of what to do, he asks what the workers want, only to once again remember their soullessness. He looks into the Ghoul Grand database to find out their past lives - things they enjoyed, their aspirations. At a small tavern now, Decina and Calce have drawn the attention of a crowd with some arm wrestling. Decina wins and Calce pays for another round of drinks. ---- :Decina: H-how's it feel to lose, loser? :Calce: Shut up, man... sssshut up. A group of demons walk by. :Calce: I'd... I'd bump their cars. :Decina: Man, don't be nasty like that. You're making me sick. :Calce: Nah, I'm just m- Decina has begun bleeding from the eyes. :Calce: ...Decina, w-we gotta leave. Now. You don't look so good. ---- Calce pulls Decina out and hails a cab, heading straight to the office. Decina passes out and Calce panics, taking the wheel and takes a dangerous back route through the city. Arriving to the office, he asks Colage where Bojangles is. Bojangles, convenietly enough, shows up with a doctor and a makeshift stretcher. Calce puts Decina on the stretcher and the doctor berates him, saying the drug reacts poorly to alcohol. Calce mumbles to himself and sits at his desk, watching Decina be taken into a backroom. Colage asks Calce about skydiving, confusing him briefly. Colage explains a lot of the employees used to want to skydive and that he wants to see if skydiving would do anything for their souls. Calce half-heartedly agrees, giving Colage the money to rent skydiving equipment. Driving a bus down the highway to the skydiving place, Colage tries to start singing with the employees, but gets no response. Calce spots the doctor driving an ambulance nearby and recklessly jumps out the window and on top of the ambulance, knocking on the windows. He sees Decina in the back and swings his way in. Firing warning shots at the driver, Calce orders the doctor to follow Colage's bus and explain. The doctor says the drug is out of Decina's blood and that she needs to rest. Calce nods and takes a seat, keeping a close eye on Colage's bus. Both vehicles arrive at the skydiving place and Calce meets back up with Colage. Colage seems unphased by Calce's reckless behavior, focusing more on the skydiving emoyee retreat. Calce asks Colage for advice, but gets no response and decides to sign up for skydiving to see if Colage will start listening. The two, along with several employees, go up in a helicopter. more coming soon Episode 6: Bones & Bones in: Dreams The Bones Brothers dream. Episode 7: Bones & Bones in: Point of No Return The Bones Brothers buckle down and commit for once. Episode 8: Bones & Bones in: Killing Death The Bones Brothers get involved in incomprehensibly higher matters. Episode 9: Bones & Bones in: Undie Another Day The Bones Brothers learn the ultimate truth. Category:Adventure Games Category:Original Games Category:Games Category:Wii U Games